Friday, 22 July 2011

I am a nasty person in general and I hate so many people in the world. The feeling almost always is mutual. I was just wondering about the reasons why humanity in general tires me..

1.I do not like people giving me advice that is almost always unsolicited. This is usually in the form of an aunt telling me how fat I am when she weighs about 200 kilos and is currently spending a few hard-earned thousands at a gym.These people do it as if they are saving your life.Well , thank you but please take a long hike.

2.Just when you start liking someone, (not romantic and all, just like spending time with someone) he or she changes and reveals some royal flaw which is mind-blowing (literally, i can feel my brain tissue crawling on my face like earthworms).

3. The level of confidence in some people also leaves me spellbound. I have this relative who will eventually join the family business and is now working at a place recommended by her father and this person never hesitates to give me the most condescending advice  about my career and the way I should live my life.  She is younger than me but a 5 minute conversation with her makes me think "wow she can give dida (granny) a run for her money"..... well she can !

4. I also hate people who lack basic forms of civility. I mean h.e.l.l.o! I am not living in the amazon , I live in the civilized world so please teach yourself some manners ! There is this brother , really old brother ,who thinks it is his birthright to look through everything in my room. He even opened my purse, in which there was another purse, I told him not to open that, he did- there was Whisper Ultra in that, I gave a sweet smile which said "I guess you don't need that".  He has stopped after that. Next time, I'll say that aloud. he now just sticks to applying all the deo's on my dressing table....yes ALL ...a spray of AXE on one underarm , Nivea Body Spray on the other, and so on. he leaves my house as an olfactory treat.

There is also one family where the kid thinks his ancestors paid for my personal computer. He comes only to play video games. I mean please why don't you save me the horror and stay at home. But then I knew it was not the poor child's fault, his father came to our house and spent the evening watching a 70's flick on zee cinema while relishing the food that my mother took 4 hours to prepare (toothpricks in chingri machh and all) !!

Bleh !

Tuesday, 19 July 2011

Fridge er dorja ghenshe holud ek kon
maggir packet e shajano shukhi grihokon

Dhulo makha boi gulo dichhe haathchhani
mone pore dhulo balir  boimelar... shei onekgulo praani

Mobile r headphone aaj boshe royeche shaantoh
Shoptaher dourjhape tara je boroi klaanto

er majhete dutoh chokh onichha prokash kore
aaj toh rob baar, eto aalo dhukbe kyano ghor e?

Wednesday, 6 July 2011

Clean and Clear.

"This is not what a 20-something's room looks like."   I agree with my mom on this, but the problem is that we both have a slightly  different idea about how it should look like. I believe I need one of those Joey-Chandler type chairs , if you are not a F.R.I.E.N.D.S person then you can imagine the chair at your dentist's like that...( the dentist's chair is the perfect honey-trap, you are comfortably seated before the torcher begins.)..

yes so I need a chair like that, a HUGE bookshelf which is HUGE breadth-wise, at 4 feet 8 inches ..thinking high or reaching high is out of the question and i do not fancy climbing up a ladder to get a book. I should have a laptop (yes I DO NOT have one...I am stuck with my desktop..I love it though !), with a hard drive of some zillion TB's....yes the TV and AC should stay intact and I should have a knocking that I don't have one parental invasion every half an hour to ask about my dinner/career choices. I would also like a walk-in closet but it's okay, I won't stretch it too far. I have also fancied having blank walls where i can throw tubs of Asian Paint (Wake Up Sid style) while decorating it......sigh..

The sad thing's idea of what my room should look like differs from can be summed up in one line...everything in it's place. What is the big deal about keeping everything in it's place? Isn't it a projection of a hidden desire to conform to caste and class hierarchy....? I have never tried putting this across to her ...I don't like the blank, Are-you-really-my-child?...kind of a look that she gives me sometimes.

 There are days when I ultimately decide to clean up a corner...and I take the entire day to do just that - clean up a corner...then i move to another corner only to realize that the first corner has things piling up again ! Why take so long to clean a corner? well there are so many distractions ! Something or the other just tumbles out and you waste minutes thinking about it...farewell diaries  remind you about old dress reminds you about a waistline issue...cassettes remind you about cassettes.... a dozen of glittering hurts-my-eye jewellery reminds you about the terrible style-sense time when you thought they looked good ... and Arabian Nights reminds you about goromer chuti on earth can some people take less than a day to clean up a corner? how?

Okay , perhaps the fact that I do not allow my maid to touch my stuff has something to do with it. I also do not like guests pacing up and down my room touching my dust-covered stuff.....excuse me? Go home...get touchy-feely with your own stuff... the dust serves a dual is a good canvas on which one can draw stick figures and it prevents stupid "emma-ki-dhulo" type of people from touching your stuff...... no I do not have the kohinoor diamond on display on my study table...all the same , even if it is last year's xerox notes, or a photo frame with no photo...I want you to stay away from it....but there is a unique specie called "grandparents" grandmother never fails to remind me how so much of dust can cause lung  problems and breathing trouble....

Of course my tiktikis (lizards) pay no heed to my desires and move about freely among my stuff...that's okay...I like them...It's just that I hate their overactive metabolic system....

Tataz........ much cleaning awaits.